Holding Hands

I realize what I'm about to write will give some people the wrong idea about me. They'll laugh and say I should probably keep things like this to myself, just in case I drive potential suitors far, far away. But this here blog is about me and my life and my thoughts. And for some reason, I like to share them. So here goes . . .

As I was finishing up my grocery shopping tonight, I saw a very blonde toddler slowly walking in the middle of the aisle just a little too far away from anybody who looked like a parent. I'd put him at about a year and a half. He was holding two bags of candy in his left hand. (I remember at least one of them was gummy worms.) I looked around for any indication of a parent or guardian, but no one seemed to be taking an interest in him. I caught his attention and said, "Do you know where your mommy is?" He just looked at me blankly. I pointed to a couple nearby and said, "Is that your mommy and daddy?" He didn't seem to understand, so I crouched down beside him and noticed that he had a runny, dirty nose. He hadn't been crying, but it was clear he had a cold. I told him I'd take him to the front of the store, so we could find his mom, and he basically stayed close to me. He seemed to be struggling with the candy a bit, so I held the bags for him and grabbed his hand. Ohhh, that little hand. It was dirty and chubby, but small.

It was magical. Something magical happens to me when I am with kids. I feel like my best self when I am with them. They love me, and I love them. What I wanted to do in that moment was pick the little guy up, but I wasn't sure he'd be okay with that. Perhaps I was too much of a stranger. But as we walked, I knew he wouldn't have minded. Still, I settled for hand-holding and led him to a security officer, who made his announcement on the PA system. I hoped it would take the mom several minutes to get to the front of the store because I wanted to keep holding the boy's hand. She appeared in less than a minute, though, carrying a baby in her arm.

And that was that. Nothing too grandiose. But I wanted to remember it.

I am not baby crazy. I want to find a husband and be married for a bit before I have kids. When I have kids, though, I will be one of the best moms you've ever seen. I'm not confident about many things, but I know that.


Thing I'm thankful for: my mom's phone calls.